Praying Through the Scared {Day 13}

So much of what I fear these days involves my children. I fear their losses. I fear their pain. I fear my failures that might someday send them to the couch of some prominent psychologist discussing how badly I screwed them up. I fear losing them, or even a part of them, to illness or disease or to some kind of accident.

I just read a blog post from a woman whose writing I love named Mary DeMuth. Her daughter is in trouble somehow and in the hospital. And Mary just got home from a week-long trip to Haiti. And it’s scary because they don’t know what’s wrong. And I am praying, even though I don’t personally know her, because I can imagine the fear and the angst. I am praying because I believe that the One to Whom I pray holds the what’s-wrong-with-Julia right in the palm of His hand. I believe He holds that right along with the unafraid peace that their family needs.

I pray for her, and I think about the times I have screamed out to God from the pit of afraid. I remember the begging over and over Please, God, please heal her. Please, God ,please give us the what-we-need for this. And for what is coming. I beg Him and plead to just take away the scary, and to calm the scared. Sometimes I feel like the scared runs crazy through my mind, unbridled and all tangled, and I can’t grab even one thought, so I just repeat my plea. Please, God, please.

Then somehow He shows me a verse like the one up at the top. About God’s whisper, Do not fear, and of His coming near. And this is what I pray for Mary, and for Julia, and for each one involved. For when I am afraid, there is something about knowing that Almighty God hears my soul’s babbling screams. Something about it that stops me in my cries and whispers calm to my soul. To know that the Sovereign King of Life knows the messy tangles of my fear and has them all sorted out is an unafraid like no other.

It doesn’t necessarily change the circumstance. But it turns the scared into not. It untangles the angst and helps me lay the big ball of knots in His very near, very intimate hand.

That’s why I pray when I’m afraid. And it’s why I am praying for Julia. Join me? Let’s pray life unafraid right into the DeMuths today.

*This month, I’m joining a bunch of other bloggers in a challenge to write for 31 days on a topic about change. Having struggled with fear (sometimes paralyzing) for a lot of my life and missing much of the living that I know God wants for me, I am on a mission to live unafraid for 31 days straight. And challenging you to join me. And I’m writing about it. You can catch up here if you’ve missed any of the days. Bring a friend, too. It’ll make it more fun. Oh, and here’s a button for you to grab if you have a blog and would like to share the unafraid life (which, btw, I would love).

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